reading the bible tonight.
song of Solomon.
Song of Solomon 6: 8 There are threescore queens, and fourscore concubines, and virgins without number.
sounds like south beach. (if without number means zero)
I return you to your regularly scheduled programming.
Song of Solomon 7: 7 This thy stature is like to a palm tree, and thy breasts to clusters of grapes.
Song of Solomon 7: 8 I said, I will go up to the palm tree, I will take hold of the boughs thereof: now also thy breasts shall be as clusters of the vine, and the smell of thy nose like apples;
Song of Solomon 7: 9 And the roof of thy mouth like the best wine for my beloved, that goeth down sweetly, causing the lips of those that are asleep to speak.
You'll regret being so damn abusive when the electric UFO gods transphase in from Dimension 10 to appoint me manager of the universe.
"Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis ad capul tuum saxum immane mittam."
(I have a catapult. Give me all the money or I will fling an enormous rock at your head.)
Happy happy birfday, Jennylee!
You're great! :)
no time with Derek today. bah.
I guess laundry and errands are the day's duties.
the CPAP didn't work too well last night. will try again tonight... it doesn't allow for much motion.
Interviewer: Sir, how often should one evacuate one's bowels?
Dr. John Harvey Kellogg: One should never, ever, interrupt one's desire to defecate. I have inquired at the Bronx and London Zoos as to the daily bowel evacuations of primates. It is not once, twice, or three times, sir, but four. At the end of an average day, their cages are filled with a veritable mountain of natural health.
Interviewer: And, sex?
Dr. John Harvey Kellogg: Sex is the sewer drain of a healthy body, sir! Any use of the sexual act other than procreation is a waste of vital energy! Wasted seeds are wasted lives!
Interviewer: Uh, eating meat?
Dr. John Harvey Kellogg: "He that killeth the ox is as if he slew a man." Each juicy morsel of meat is alive, and swarming with the same filth as found in the carcass of a dead rat. Meat eaters, sir, are drowning in a tide of gore. What is a sausage? A sausage is an indigestible balloon of decayed beef, riddled with tuberculosis. Eat and die! For I have seen many a repentant meat glutton his body full of uric acid and remorse, his soul adrift on the raft in the ocean of poisonous slime, sloshin' against the walls of the body's kitchen.
Dr. John Harvey Kellogg: The liver is the only thing standing between the smoker and death! Also certain other things have to be avoided... like, uh, feather beds, and romantic novels... and the, uh, touching of one's organs. Masturbation is the silent killer of the night! The vilest sin of self-pollution! It is the sin of Onan!
Interviewer: Uh, Dr. Kellogg, how did you come to invent the corn flake?
Dr. John Harvey Kellogg: The corn flake, sir, is just one of my 75 creations for heathy livin', among them peanut butter and the electric blanket.
Interviewer: And what about your imitators? There are 103 other corn flakes presently being manufactured here in Battle Creek!
Dr. John Harvey Kellogg: Sir, corn is the injuns gift to the new world, and the corn flake is my gift to the entire world.
Interviewer: And what do you think about your brother?
Dr. John Harvey Kellogg: My brother, W.K. Kellogg, worked for me as a low-paid assistant for many years. Now he's off on his own and amassin' fortunes with my corn flake invention. Unfortunately, he has chosen the family name to promote it. But the whole world knows only one Kellogg: me, Dr. John Harvey Kellogg! Surgeon, inventor, author, and crusader for biological livin'! I do not seek monetary rewards, for I am called to a greater glory. Here at the Battle Creek Sanitarium, the spirits soar, the mind is educated, and the bowels---the bowels are born again!