Sasquatches on the Dinner Table?
In a bid to provide a new revenue stream for Scottovia’s Agriculture industry, it has been suggested that sasquatches could be added to the menu.
- The fact is, the sasquatch population is out of control,” says Beef-Based Agriculture spokesperson Jazz Spirit. “We have to do something about them anyway, so why not market them as tasty snacks? We could have sasquatch kebabs, sasquatch pies, sasquatch-on-a-sticks–the possibilities are endless! Let’s not pass up this golden opportunity to provide a feast, if you will, for our economy.
- “I agree that something needs to be done about sasquatch over-population,” says random passer-by Miranda Jefferson, “but eating them? That’s kind of gross. Let’s just shoot the ones we have to and shovel their bodies into ditches like normal.”
- “I am shocked and appalled!” declared SPCA President Al du Pont. “If anyone needs to be culled, it’s us humans. The sasquatches were here first, remember? We need to take this as a sign to get our industry–agriculture in particular–to back off. The sasquatch is part of what makes Scottovia a great nation!”
#3 Accepted, of course.